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Social Media Detox

Every so often, I like to take a break from all social media. Over time, with constant use of these platforms, they take over your life. Wanting to know the latest adventures of friends and family members strangers, and even dictators. Mental health being what it is lately, is a fragile thing. I don't need new triggers to set me off. I honestly didn't need to know that your last three miscarriages was a result of your cheating husbands syphilis and other stds he passed on to you.  I took a week off. Not a very long time to make a difference. But it did. I liked seeing me being me and doing the things I forgot I enjoyed. I built a desk, got a professional camera and have been re acquainting myself with a small but important passion of mine. Meanial to some, fascinating to others. The point of it all, is to shut off the modern gossip and bragging technology and feel your soul. Taste the morning haze, experience lovemaking again for what it is. A beautiful connection with your par...
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Time is a Thief

My 52nd birthday is in a few days. Covid-19 lockdowns first started 6 years ago. I've been doing my TOM MONITOR music and art project now for 8 years! Everything has been a blur with the exception of a few memorable events along the way. There is a sense of urgency to hurry up and complete what I have set out to do. Honestly, that objective has changed quite a few times along the way. Not for the reason of failure, but more for adaptation.  I did learn that just because you want things to be your way, and your way only, it's not just feasible. At least not when you have honest people on your side making sure you don't believe some unrealistic goals. No, I don't listen to everything said to me, and I still go against the norm, but for survival in this current time frame, possibly anytime really, you have to weigh your options. The days of going full on with a dream and a couple of bucks in your pocket are long gone. Which is unfortunate because that's where historica...
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Urgent Before and After Care

 I caught this nasty influenza virus that has been going around. I knew something was wrong on that Wednesday at work when I felt a bit off. On Thursday, I knew something was going to hit me hard. Sure enough, Friday afternoon, I was out for the count. 102 degrees Fahrenheit fever for a couple of days. Everything had to be canceled. Working on new music, hanging out with Tequila Mockingbird, and shopping. It was god awful. Sweating like a madman and soaking up the pillows with illness, was not an option. Having decent medical insurance, I told my roommate that I was going to take an UBER or drive myself to the afterhours clinic. She accompanied me and offered to drive. Even though I felt horrible, I drove. Afterall, two years ago when I broke two ribs, I drove myself to the emergency room as no one was available to take me. I had this one.  Luck was very much on my side that 4:30 pm. I was expecting a more than 4 hour wait but ended up being a five minute miracle. I have never...
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Trauma Drama

My "trauma" goes back as far as I can remember which is about age 1. Yes, I can go back that far but not as clear as before. It's mostly emotional based trauma for me as physical injuries including amputations do heal and we learn to adapt. You can call me an only child but that's not all true except there are half siblings involved which is where some emotional damage comes from. To some, it's perfectly normal to experience this. Not me.  To spare my feelings, the family decided to keep knowledge that my father was a less than great human being to my mom and his step kids. I always wondered why there were so many whispers and secrets even up until my mom's passing in January 2018. When the matriarch dies, not all things go to the grave. Turns out that I was always being judged by my half siblings and never truly accepted as one of them even though all eight of us shared the same mother.  Jealousy in abundance. I got all the good toys, all the new clothes, eve...
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What Now?

Hello and hope you are well. Welcome to my blog documenting my progress towards financial and spiritual freedom. Actually, not really. Since I'm better at wrtiting than creating some YouTube channel to exploit myself, this is the vehicle I'll be using for the time being. From my almost 52 years of life, everyone thinks they're special in some form or another. This includes myself which is why this blog exists. 
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